What is Insomnia? – Part 2

The Droning Voice doesn’t care what you sleep in.  Whatever you want to wear in the privacy of your own home is nobody’s business.  There are, however, a LOT of businesses dedicated to convincing you that whatever you are wearing (or not wearing) is what is keeping you awake.

They might be correct.  Or they might just be trying to make a fast buck.  Either way, it seems that there are two basic options for sleepwear:

  1. Sleep naked
  2. Sleep in some sort of garment(s) designed for…sleep. The Droning Voice will comment that she has seen an increasing number of people actually wearing pajamas in various public places, causing her to wonder if these people are so sleep-deprived that they want to be ready to curl up in, say, the hardware department of Walmart and catch a few Zzzzs if the sleepies hit.  The Droning Voice has, so far, refrained from suggesting they also have a pillow and blanket handy.  So far.

Option 1 is self-explanatory.

Option 2, however, is quite the proverbial can of worms.  Ideally an individual wants:

  • a garment that will keep them warm, but not too warm
  • a garment that is loose enough to not cut off any necessary circulation, but not so loose that it will tangle up in knots and cause the individual to risk death-by-pajamas if they have to get up in the middle of the night to attend to potty urges, refrigerator urges, or urges to stalk ex-lovers online
  • a garment that isn’t scratchy (The Droning Voice includes this for those who need it explained)

The vast selection of sleepwear is…gob-smacking.  The Droning Voice found several selections on Amazon, though notes that many of these delightful styles can be found elsewhere.  One of these styles may suit your needs and aid you in drifting off to slumber land.  The Droning Voice will also advise that she found plenty of garments that, while meant for wearing in the bedroom, are not particularly meant to be sleep inducing.  She will also state that if you type “ridiculous pajamas” in to your search engine of choice, she is not to be blamed for any ill-advised purchases you might make, though, who knows?  Maybe your mother-in-law WILL like that Sponge Bob Square Pants sleeping ensemble.  The Droning Voice also thinks there could be a market for custom pajama bottoms that have a photo of somebody you personally despise printed right on the butt, all the better to wear when you have had a nice helping of beans and cornbread.  The meal might keep you awake, but there may be a certain amount of satisfaction knowing where the output is hitting, even though you, personally don’t have to look at it.

Pleasant dreams!